Top 100 Best Zombie Movies Part 3
Top 100 Best Zombie Movies: A Toast to the Zombie Gaming Revolution
Intro:
We love zombies. It’s our duty as geeks and/or gamers to be fascinated by the social commentary so often paralleled in modern zombie cinema; or atleast to enjoy watching people get their faces eaten. Either way they’re lovable creatures with a following that is to be truly admired. With the ever increasing boost of zombie/undead themed games, I present to the general public a list of the best zombie movies (and worst) to date. Of course this list is my personal opinion and very much open to dispute, there are also plenty of zombie movies I have not seen that probably deserve to be on this list. This is simply one zombie fan’s attempt to further the spread of zombie admiration and perhaps get some people into some of the best zombie movies they may have never before seen. Keeping the interest high keeps the zombie games coming!
Numbers 80-71:
80] The Vanguard
Synopsis: "...From this apocalyptic nightmare, an entity known as the Corporation devised a course of action to cull the human race and start a mass depopulation program. But the drug they created to kill instead reduces humans to a primitive ape-like state, now known as Biosyns..."
Well, sadly this movie had a promising start. It's campy and indie, but it was also charming to start. Sure it's mega cheese, 'specially since we have, a-hem, 'Biosyns'... and not Zombies. Still, our hero presents himself immediately with a beard worthy of Chuck Norris, as he chops down zombies with his dual hatchets. Also, he cruises down the street with his bitchin' sunglasses and hard-ass expression on a Harley bike. Errm, a Harley bicycle I mean. Ya, that scene alone kept me attentive for the next little while, it was so well played and funny that it meant the rest of the film would follow suit right? No 🙁 It has it's highlights here and there, but the movie drops off the radar when it stops trying to be a campy cheesy charming (aka CCC) little movie and instead starts to take itself seriously. Too seriously. The attempt at a serious movie with that low a budget was a bad idea, and if they kept the movie as entertaining and engrossing as the start, it would be a classic with a new Zombie Hero for sure.
79] The Blind Series
Synopsis: In Tombs of the Blind Dead the story is as follows: "In medieval times, a group of renegade knights were executed for their black magic rituals. In 1970s Portugal, vacationing college kids fall prey to the knights' zombified corpses, resurrected from the dead to feast on the blood of the living." In Return of the Blind Dead, well the title should really sum that one up for you nice and easy.
What do you say to this... really. Well firstly, the zombies are pretty awesome looking. Undead zombie/skeletons, long decayed, in tattered dirty hooded robes; very well done. Both movies offer this, and an overacting cast that keep forgetting how to kill a zombie every time it comes down to crunch time. Still these are classics, but are definitely not for the casual zombie movie lover.
78] Plaga Zombie: Mutant Zone
Synopsis: "... a small band of survivors trying to escape from a city that has been quarantined after a mutant virus spreads through the area..."
Argentina made an epic zombie film (two actually, this being the sequel), that alone is worthy of your attention. However it is a super, super, super indie film. It sports ridiculous scenarios, unbelievable characters, and has gore so silly and overdone that it's hilarious yet entertaining (a la Braindead style). The characters, as bizarre as they are, are an interesting mash of characteristics that make them truly unique and hilarious to watch. The zombies themselves get diced up in a whole manner of over the top gushy ways, and as silly as some of them look and behave it's a great foreign (for most I suppose) zombie movie.
77] Hell's Ground (Zibahkhana)
Synopsis: "After lying to their parents and running off to see a rock concert, five teenagers leave their suburb neighborhood of Islamabad and travel into the wild only to have their van break down and they get set upon by not only flesh eating zombies, but a ghoulish hitchhiker, and a blood-soaked, burqa-wearing killer."
Okay, this is Pakistan's first gore flick; it does it well. Our group of kids have to traverse a gauntlet of zombies and fiends while meeting horrible demises along the way. Seriously though, they have to run from zombies and still get plagued by a mace wielding maniac... That is some seriously bad luck.
76] My Boyfriend's Back
Synopsis: "Missy McCloud is the most beautiful girl in school and Johnny Dingle has been in love with her for years. One night, Johnny is killed trying to win her over, and soon he comes back from the dead, and wins Missy's heart."
An interesting horror-comedy about, well just freakin' guess. That's right, buddy dies and comes back to whoo his love from beyond the grave. Naturally, he begins getting unnatural 'impulses', and has to find a solution to keep his love without, y'know, eating her. It's by no means gold, but it's super cheese and is decent as a horror-comedy combo.
75] Night of the Living Dead 3D
Synopsis: "...Barb and her brother Johnny arrive late for the burial of their aunt -- and walk straight into a nightmare. With zombies on her heels, Barb flees the cemetery and is rescued by Ben, a local college student. The two seek refuge in the nearby farmhouse of the Cooper family, where the laid-back residents aren't remotely prepared to have their lives turn into a horror movie..."
This movie sucks. I'll say it right now. The story is a re-imagining of the original, except the characters are (annoying) druggies and a serious lack of the ever so important social commentary. It gets points for a few things atleast however; the gore is good, it's got Captain Spaulding himself, and it was the first horror movie of recent times to be presented in 3D. For those points alone I give the flick credit, but asides from that this movie was (and still is) more or less a template for studios to use on how to avoid making future crappy 3D movies.
74] House of the Dead Series
Synopsis: "...Set on an island off the coast, a techno rave party attracts a diverse group of college coeds and a Coast Guard officer. Soon, they discover that their X-laced escapades are to be interrupted by zombies and monsters..." and as for the much better (only by comparison to the original) sequel; "In Guesta Verde University, the deranged Professor Curien is trying to bring back the dead, killing students for the experiment..." then some soldiers come in to clean up.
House of the Dead is great. The game that is. This was Uwe Boll's first venture into mainstream cinema and he has been berated by most ever since. The movie is quite honestly garbage, despite great gore and well done undead/creatues, the movie ruined itself with bad acting, curious choices for plot development, and a horrific choice in music. However Mr. Boll (if he hasn't already) is releasing a recut version of the film in a parody-comedic type vein. I may actually dedicate an hour of my life to give it a chance... however I'm sure booze will need to be had.
The sequel is alright, as far as bad zombie movies go. It has some decent gore effects, but again bad acting and an obvious lack of budget ruin the movie. Oh, and the virus is spreadable through mosquito bites. Uhh, why wasn't the mosquito a zombie too then? Damnit, they had the cure infront of them the whole time, hidden inside a little pest! The irony of it all! But no, it's pretty bad, so I'd avoid it unless you are a true zombie fanatic, then you'll probably get a good kick out of it.
73] Dead Set (TV Series)
Synopsis: "It's eviction night at the Big Brother house, but something very strange is happening; the dead are coming alive and attacking the living. When zombies attack all of the audience outside, the Big Brother contestants are unaware of the death outside the fan-proof (and zombie-proof) big brother house until the show's runner, Kelly, comes into the house and warns them of the doom outside."
I hate reality TV, so color me ecstatic when members of 'Big Brother' get presented to the outside world after zombies have taken over. Unfortunately British TV is horrendously expensive where I live, so I have only been able to see bits and pieces of this, but of course had to stop since too much story was missed in between viewings. This is something I'm sure you want to sit down and enjoy start to finish.
I'd love to post a trailer for the show, but sadly it's tosser of an owner has requested embedding disabled on all videos for said trailer. So here's a character making her own jerkey treat while all undeadered, but wow is her hair still immaculate; reality TV can even keep the undead from becoming an eyesore.
72] Trailer Park of Terror
Synopsis: "...Six troubled high school students and their chaperon, an optimistic youth ministries Pastor, return from an outdoor character building retreat in the mountains. During a raging storm, their bus crashes, hopelessly stranding them in the middle of the Trucker's Triangle, a forgotten locus of consummate evil in the middle of nowhere..."
What an awesome movie. I mean it's absolutely ridiculous, but it works so well that it's entertaining from start to finish. The intro is an interesting play out of how the trailer park becomes an area of undead activity (along with introducing the characters we will be watching as decaying corpses later) and sets up a feeling of sympathy. Well that sympathy doesn't last long, because those bastards are relentless and sinister. This is why you don't make deals with the Devil boys and girls! Despite the unattractive title and bad grindhouse looking box art, this movie is truly a diamond in the rough. So give it a shot.
71] Children Shouldn't Play With Dead Things
Synopsis: "Actors led by Alan Ormsby go to graveyard on remote island to act out [a] necromantic ritual. The ritual works, and soon the dead are walking about and chowing down on human flesh."
A bunch of kids make friends with a corpse and have a real gasser with it. "Haha, isn't playing with this guy's corpse sooo funny?!" then WHAM! Their new friend doesn't take too kindly to this... which is sort of why you don't screw around with the black arts... and a mass of undead come alive to have their own fun with the kids. Of course by fun, yes, I do mean eat.
Movie synopses care of IMDB or each film's respective Official Website.
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